You are the creator of your life. What you see in your outer world is a direct reflection of what’s happening in your inner world, including your beliefs, your values, your expectations for yourself, and the standards you have in each area of your life. All of these categories fall under the realm of our thoughts and what we focus on. We must constantly be aware of our thoughts and focus by asking ourselves how we can be the greatest expression of ourselves. This will help our minds focus on the ideas and thoughts that can help us attract those things, people, and resources that are aligned with our highest selves and what we truly want in our lives.
Here are 6 Keys to becoming the creator of your life!
- We have to hold the belief that we have the personal power to create the life we want. This one belief alone can change the direction of our lives and put us in a position where we are the owners of our lives and take responsibility for our well-being. Holding this belief empowers us to take action in our own lives and be intentional when making important decisions. The alternative is to think like a victim and believe that life happens to us and that we have no influence on the people in our lives, the things that happen to us, or the direction our life takes. Having a victim mindset sets the stage for situations where we hand over authority to others, such as our parents, our significant other, our friends, or anyone else, to make decisions for us. When we start believing that we can decide what is best for us, take intentional actions, and make decisions that are in our best interest, we become empowered to become the creators of our lives. Our focus, words, and actions become more deliberate when we are certain of our power to create the life we desire. We can choose to be victims or creators of our lives, but we can’t be both. We have to meditate on and believe that we are the creators of our lives and that our primary tools for creation are our thoughts and beliefs, which result in the words we use to express and describe ourselves, our lives, and our possibilities.
- Understand the power of our emotions. Our emotions have the power to determine the quality of our lives. Tell me the top 5 emotions you experience daily, and it won’t be difficult for me to determine the quality of your life. It is important to know this so that we can be more aware of the emotions we are consistently experiencing and then do backward engineering and ask ourselves, “What do I need to be telling myself and believing in order to consistently feel what I am feeling? Think about it! An individual who is consistently happy, generous, and hopeful has a very different belief system than an individual who is angry, selfish, and merciless. Why is this? If we did backward engineering, we’d understand that our thoughts and the meaning we give to the events in our lives are the gateway to what we feel. Knowing this and fully understanding the influence our thoughts have on our emotions puts us in a position of power by giving us the opportunity to use this information as leverage to change our emotions. By simply being more aware of our thoughts when we notice how they are making us feel, we can change them to be more empowering and, many times, change them to be more realistic beliefs about ourselves and our circumstances. However, this information also empowers us by giving us the opportunity to play offensively in our lives through the use of affirmations and positive self-statements to deliberately create the emotions we actually want to feel.
- Base our actions and decisions on our present discernment. The dictionary defines discernment as the ability to judge something well or the ability to understand and comprehend something. This is important to remember when making decisions because many of us have never disciplined ourselves to make decisions using our present discernment. Often, we make decisions or don’t make important decisions to avoid re-experiencing past pain or to avoid some future perceived pain that we believe may happen based on our past experiences. When we make decisions based on any of these, we keep ourselves prisoners of our past or captives of our fears of the future. We cannot live a full life and experience all possibilities when we live in fear of feeling our emotions. By using our present discernment, we open ourselves up to living in the present moment and allow the present moment to inform our next moves. In order to do this, we must be open to making mistakes and learning from them.
- Live in a state of positive expectation. This simply implies that we live in a state of optimism. When we are optimistic, we expect more positive outcomes than negative ones. By holding an optimistic belief system, we let go of the fear of failure and understand that even when something doesn’t go as planned, we can still extract a lesson from the experience. We hold a core belief that everything is working for us and not against us. Multiple studies have shown the benefits of optimism for our health, our well-being, and our ability to consistently experience joy and happiness.
- Live in a state of gratitude. Gratitude alone has the power to instantly change our mood. The next time you feel upset, angry, sad, or anxious, stop yourself and take a minute to identify five things you are grateful for in your life and why. Then, notice how doing this activity changes your mood and perspective. Notice how you cannot feel painful emotions while at the same time feeling gratitude. These are incongruent emotions. Gratitude is simply the act of directing your focus to those things you are thankful for and allowing yourself to experience the emotions that follow. Practicing gratitude is a choice, and if done consistently, it can become one of the most powerful habits you can ever engage in since it feeds your beliefs, which, as I pointed out above, gives way to more positive and empowering emotions.
- Be aware of the meaning given to those painful life experiences. What do you think about when you hear, “All roads lead to Rome.” Well, this saying is very true when it comes to our thoughts, the meanings we give to events in our lives, and the power the meanings we ascribe to our experiences have on us as the creators of our lives. The meaning we give to our experiences has an attached emotion and feeling, which in turn has the power to influence all similar experiences we have from that point on. The way this works is that the emotions we experience anchor events in our psyche, and the stronger the emotions we experience, the more memorable the event is. This works well when the emotion is a “feel good” emotion; however, when it is a painful emotion, our brain starts believing that anything we experience in the present or future that is similar to that anchored painful event is dangerous. When I said, “All roads lead to Rome,” I was referring to the power thoughts and meaning have on our emotions and future actions, behaviors, and decisions. For example, if we believe that we are not worthy as a result of the meaning we gave to our childhood experiences, that will have a direct impact on how we show up in the world and how empowered we feel to be the creators of our lives. For this reason, we must pay attention to the meaning we give to our experiences, and we must even go back to old experiences and events that have shaped our lives to reexamine the meanings we have attached to them and correct any disempowering meanings by replacing them with more realistic and empowering beliefs. This process is part of the healing experience.
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